The breakdown of relationships and why they fail
All females need sexual tension from a prospective or existing partner to consider having or continuing to have, a physical relationship with them. Lose this from the start and you will become mayor of the friend zone.
Definition of sexual tension - Cocky and funny. A loud mouth, walking the thin line of winding her up without overly offending her. Posing as a challenge and not doing everything she says without a bit of give and take.
No sexual tension = a dead relationship.
There are 4 general types of relationship.
THE FRIEND ZONE RELATIONSHIP
Familiarity without sexual tension. (Usually the male not opening his mouth to challenge a girl he REALLY fancies.) This leads to complacency in that the female becomes numb to the presence of the male (because he doesn't stimulate her emotionally through lack of communication) and associates him as a social partner only. This leads to, the friend zone. The male is permanently seen as a non sexual friend only. Once a female has made up her mind that you are a friend and she says the F word. It is the kiss of death for any attraction you have for her. You will never have a physical relationship with her from this point onward and will spend the rest of your time with her, hearing how she got off with this great guy at the weekend. All the while you're dying inside. When you eventually tell her how you truly feel and she rejects you. She will sit and wonder why you are not answering the phone any more as you were a great listener to her problems.
PURLEY PHYSICAL ATTRACTION
Purely physical attraction. After a while a lack of sexual variety leads to complacency in both parties. Boredom / lack of sexual tension makes both parties become fed up with each other quickly. This leads to a breakup of the relationship and both parties go their separate ways. This type of relationship can be prolonged if both parties are willing to explore their sexual fantasies and keep variety in the bedroom. The long term feasibility of such a relationship is still in question.
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION & SEXUAL TENSION
Physical attraction + sexual tension equals love at first site. Female tries to change male to her ideal image of a man. The male resists, lack of conformity equals continued sexual tension which equals a long lasting relationship viewed as love in a love hate relationship.
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION & SEXUAL TENSION VERSION 2
Physical attraction + sexual tension equals love at first site. Female tries to change male to her ideal image of a man. The male conforms and no longer poses a challenge. Female gets bored as there's no sexual tension any more. Relationship starts to slip. Male thinks everything is ok as he is doing everything she wants but in reality, she has lost all interest in him. It is at this point that she will either stay with him in a purely partnership arrangement or leave him as soon as a better male comes along that stimulates her emotionally.
THE OVER POSSESSIVE PARTNER
The above scenarios do not take into account over possessive partners that bully or smother their partners to the point that they leave or attack them. This is known in some circles as 'a bunny boiler'. So named after the film fatal attraction where an obsessed Glenn Close cooks the family's pet rabbit in a revenge attack for Michael Douglas spurning her advances after a brief sexual relationship.
Usually over possessiveness stems from the insecurities or lack of trust in one partner. (They may have been hurt in the past and are determined to not let it happen again, to the point where it becomes an obsession.) Or they're a total psycho, run for it!
Relationship number 4 is the most common. In general you will see it while at the shopping center. The husband pushes the trolley and every time the wife speaks, it's either yes dear or no dear. The husband has conformed to do what the female requires in order to have a quiet life. The female thinks she is superior, in control and has mastered the art of man handling.
In reality she is destroying the mans animal attraction to her. She is slowly numbing him into an affair with someone else. Little does she know it but as he no longer poses a challenge to her, she is slowly becoming numb to him. As his animal instinct is tamed and he finds her attractive less and less, they will suddenly, one day, find themselves in a loveless marriage.
They will at this point be co-existing in a purely partnership based relationship for the sake of survival or because of children. This has lead to relationships breaking up after 30 years of marriage and both partners wonder why their marriage is so lifeless.
It has been described as 'the spark fizzling out'. In reality it is the lack of sexual tension or sexual variety. Remember, a female thinks with her emotions and a man thinks with his…..err….physical attraction mechanism.
If a male no longer stimulates her emotionally, she will seek it elsewhere. Equally if a female is no longer sexually attractive to a man, he too will look elsewhere.
Don't get me wrong ladies, some things can't be reversed, like aging and the passage of time, but there are ways to grow old and still be sexy to a male partner. A boring sex life is a recipe for disaster and being sexy is more than a lack of wrinkles. If in doubt, it's time to start experimenting in the bedroom to see what pushes his and your buttons. Explore each others sexual fantasies and do things you only dream about at night while your partner is asleep. You'll be surprised how quickly your relationship bounces back as a result.
If you have any sense you will heed my warning weather you are male or female, married or just starting a relationship. Try to keep the sexual tension alive between the two of you. If not, you will be on the next train to dumpsville wondering why he or she slept with someone else.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
How to Improve Your Skin’s Elasticity
How to Improve Your Skin’s Elasticity
If you are a woman in your late 30's or higher, you have probably noticed your skin’s elasticity is not what it used to be. For most of us this is inevitable. Other body parts begin to sag as we age so why should our skin be any different? Fortunately, there are options available that will help to reverse the effects of age on the skin and also improve elasticity in loose skin that's caused by weight loss. To better understand what exactly causes our skin to sag in the first place, let’s go over a bit of the physical side of the process.
Your skin has two distinct layers called the epidermis and the dermis. The epidermis is on the surface and contains the pigment, epidermal cells, and proteins. The dermis is the layer located underneath the epidermis and contains the dermal cells, blood vessels and nerves, hair follicles, and oil glands plus it is responsible for providing the nutrients for the epidermal layer. It also contains the connective tissue as well as our skin’s collagen.
Although it is located beneath the epidermal layer, it is changes in the dermal layer that cause the outer skin to wrinkle and loose elasticity as we age. As we grow older, the amount of fat found in our lower layer of skin decreases, our glands produce less oil, and collagen and elastin fibers loose their elasticity. The natural process of cell reproduction in the dermal layer also decreases as we grow older, resulting in a slower rejuvenation of our skin cells. So, now that we know just why this happens let’s talk about the part that is more important to those of us suffering from this affliction, the solution.
Although there is no actual magic pill designed to stop this natural aging process, there are options available to slow down and, in some cases, reverse the signs of aging skin. Of course, surgery is always an option and a face lift can take years off your appearance. However, it is a major procedure and recovery is long and can be quite painful. If this is an option you would consider, make sure to do your research and only go to a board certified plastic surgeon with a well established reputation.
For those looking for a less invasive route, there are a variety of products on the market today that offer an easier and less painful solution, though with less dramatic results. Many of these products contain ingredients like copper, Ginseng, elastin, collagen, and HGH (human growth hormone). These are all ingredients that have been proven to have some level of rejuvenating effects on the skin and its elasticity. Most products are geared toward sensitive skin and are generally to be allergy-free.
If you are a woman in your late 30's or higher, you have probably noticed your skin’s elasticity is not what it used to be. For most of us this is inevitable. Other body parts begin to sag as we age so why should our skin be any different? Fortunately, there are options available that will help to reverse the effects of age on the skin and also improve elasticity in loose skin that's caused by weight loss. To better understand what exactly causes our skin to sag in the first place, let’s go over a bit of the physical side of the process.
Your skin has two distinct layers called the epidermis and the dermis. The epidermis is on the surface and contains the pigment, epidermal cells, and proteins. The dermis is the layer located underneath the epidermis and contains the dermal cells, blood vessels and nerves, hair follicles, and oil glands plus it is responsible for providing the nutrients for the epidermal layer. It also contains the connective tissue as well as our skin’s collagen.
Although it is located beneath the epidermal layer, it is changes in the dermal layer that cause the outer skin to wrinkle and loose elasticity as we age. As we grow older, the amount of fat found in our lower layer of skin decreases, our glands produce less oil, and collagen and elastin fibers loose their elasticity. The natural process of cell reproduction in the dermal layer also decreases as we grow older, resulting in a slower rejuvenation of our skin cells. So, now that we know just why this happens let’s talk about the part that is more important to those of us suffering from this affliction, the solution.
Although there is no actual magic pill designed to stop this natural aging process, there are options available to slow down and, in some cases, reverse the signs of aging skin. Of course, surgery is always an option and a face lift can take years off your appearance. However, it is a major procedure and recovery is long and can be quite painful. If this is an option you would consider, make sure to do your research and only go to a board certified plastic surgeon with a well established reputation.
For those looking for a less invasive route, there are a variety of products on the market today that offer an easier and less painful solution, though with less dramatic results. Many of these products contain ingredients like copper, Ginseng, elastin, collagen, and HGH (human growth hormone). These are all ingredients that have been proven to have some level of rejuvenating effects on the skin and its elasticity. Most products are geared toward sensitive skin and are generally to be allergy-free.
Sex and the Single Mom
Sex and the Single Mom
Single moms, more so than anyone, have to be exceedingly careful about the type of man they select as life-long partners. No sensible woman wants to be judged soley on her appearence or sex appeal, right? Moreoever, who would even want a man mostly interested in sex without a real commitment, right again? These questions create an age-old conundrum. Exactly, how does one find a guy who loves them and only wants what is best for them? Let's take it up a notch. How do you resist those natural impulses to throw caution to the wind and break down and have sex?
For starters. . .
Read between the lines.
A wise person once said, Words carry a little weight, but actions truly reveal the entireity of a matter. When you meet a new guy, be especially observant of the kinds of things he talks about. Carefully listen to his conversation. Remember, you can usually learn plenty about a person simply by listening to them. If the conversation is laced with sexual innuendos, that is your "red flag".
Where’s the fire...
Be leery of physical contact early in the relationship. Someone who is overly "touchy" after knowing you for a short amount of time might have less than honorable motives. Yes, some guys are “touchy feely” with women. But think for a moment, if you marry a man who can't keep his hands to himself, you are asking for trouble!
Let get real, here. As single moms, it's only natural to enjoy the attention of men, but don’t allow loneliness or insecurity to propel you into a relationship that may bring pain later. You are far too precious for that, single mom.
Take your time with the physical stuff. Approach the dating relationship the same way you would with a platonic friend. Save the kissing or hugging until you really know the guy.
We often give away far too much too soon in our interpersonal encounters. Don't be the type woman that every guy in the neighborhood knows what it’s like to kiss and squeeze. Even if he says he loves you, remember that love waits. Love is patient, love is kind and real love will never disrespect you. Slow down, enjoy the progression of the new relationship. There's no fire, so hold your horses!
God’s plan for you...
God has a plan and it's not about pointless denial. His plan is first marriage and then sex after the legal, spiritual and emotional commitment. When you create a list of rules for your kids, you do so to protect them, right? Well, God is no different. He loves you and wants to spare you unnecessary grief.
There is forgiveness....
If for whatever reason, you have engaged in a sexual relationship outside of marriage understand that God still loves you. Our blunders don't make Him love us any less. He desperately wants to put the pieces of your life back together and make all things new again.
Living life "our way", guided by our emotions or feelings, always brings disappointment and shame. However, God specializes in such wounds. Allow Him to cleanse your pain and remove your guilt (read 1John 1:9). If you confess your sin, He WILL forgive it. He’s promised. The next and most crucial step is for you to forgive yourself.
Our children....
Our children rely on us to model appropriate moral standards. Most wise moms advise their teens to abstain from sex before marriage. We carefully explain to them the dangers of sex "now a days". We share how abstinence protects us against sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. Taking this into account, why should we want anything different for ourselves? Our children are growing up so fast. Our time with them is very precious. Let's not taint it recovering from unecessary love-related heartbreaks. Nothing is worse for children than to see their moms wounded, hurt, bitter and dejected.
My mother recently told me, (relative to my health) 'a good mother takes supreme care of herself for the sake of her children'. I think the same applies to emotional health. Don’t run the risk of giving your body and soul away only to be left with an empty bed and broken heart. It really isn't worth it, single mom.
Single moms, more so than anyone, have to be exceedingly careful about the type of man they select as life-long partners. No sensible woman wants to be judged soley on her appearence or sex appeal, right? Moreoever, who would even want a man mostly interested in sex without a real commitment, right again? These questions create an age-old conundrum. Exactly, how does one find a guy who loves them and only wants what is best for them? Let's take it up a notch. How do you resist those natural impulses to throw caution to the wind and break down and have sex?
For starters. . .
Read between the lines.
A wise person once said, Words carry a little weight, but actions truly reveal the entireity of a matter. When you meet a new guy, be especially observant of the kinds of things he talks about. Carefully listen to his conversation. Remember, you can usually learn plenty about a person simply by listening to them. If the conversation is laced with sexual innuendos, that is your "red flag".
Where’s the fire...
Be leery of physical contact early in the relationship. Someone who is overly "touchy" after knowing you for a short amount of time might have less than honorable motives. Yes, some guys are “touchy feely” with women. But think for a moment, if you marry a man who can't keep his hands to himself, you are asking for trouble!
Let get real, here. As single moms, it's only natural to enjoy the attention of men, but don’t allow loneliness or insecurity to propel you into a relationship that may bring pain later. You are far too precious for that, single mom.
Take your time with the physical stuff. Approach the dating relationship the same way you would with a platonic friend. Save the kissing or hugging until you really know the guy.
We often give away far too much too soon in our interpersonal encounters. Don't be the type woman that every guy in the neighborhood knows what it’s like to kiss and squeeze. Even if he says he loves you, remember that love waits. Love is patient, love is kind and real love will never disrespect you. Slow down, enjoy the progression of the new relationship. There's no fire, so hold your horses!
God’s plan for you...
God has a plan and it's not about pointless denial. His plan is first marriage and then sex after the legal, spiritual and emotional commitment. When you create a list of rules for your kids, you do so to protect them, right? Well, God is no different. He loves you and wants to spare you unnecessary grief.
There is forgiveness....
If for whatever reason, you have engaged in a sexual relationship outside of marriage understand that God still loves you. Our blunders don't make Him love us any less. He desperately wants to put the pieces of your life back together and make all things new again.
Living life "our way", guided by our emotions or feelings, always brings disappointment and shame. However, God specializes in such wounds. Allow Him to cleanse your pain and remove your guilt (read 1John 1:9). If you confess your sin, He WILL forgive it. He’s promised. The next and most crucial step is for you to forgive yourself.
Our children....
Our children rely on us to model appropriate moral standards. Most wise moms advise their teens to abstain from sex before marriage. We carefully explain to them the dangers of sex "now a days". We share how abstinence protects us against sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. Taking this into account, why should we want anything different for ourselves? Our children are growing up so fast. Our time with them is very precious. Let's not taint it recovering from unecessary love-related heartbreaks. Nothing is worse for children than to see their moms wounded, hurt, bitter and dejected.
My mother recently told me, (relative to my health) 'a good mother takes supreme care of herself for the sake of her children'. I think the same applies to emotional health. Don’t run the risk of giving your body and soul away only to be left with an empty bed and broken heart. It really isn't worth it, single mom.
7 Ways to Drive a Man Wild
It's unbelievable the amount of bad advice there is out there on how to seduce a man or if they give you advice they forget to tell you how to use it properly. So here are a couple of tips on what to do and what not to do to drive a man wild and an instruction manual.
1) Dress in a way that makes you feel sexy and also flatters your figure. Let's face it some of us look ridiculous in stilettos. Red is almost always a good color. Try a red slinky dress and comfortable undergarments. Those torture devices they sell to suck in our guts look great under the dress but are not sexy at all when you are trying to yank them off for a wild night of pleasure.
2) Pay attention to what he has to say for a change. Yes you can talk about yourself but a man finds it really refreshing when a woman allows him to have his own time in the spotlight.
3) Don't talk about your ex. If he asks, keep it short and sweet. You are starting fresh with this guy. No need to bring in the ghost of past relationships. You are perfect to him in the beginning. There is no reason to make him wonder if the last guy who dumped you was right.
4)Wear a light attractive scent. This means layering scents. Bathe in scented bath oils first. Then apply a light powder in the same scent. Finally spray the same scented perfume in front of you and walk into the mist. Do this about 45 minutes before you see him. If you overpower him with your scent, instead of wanting to edge a bit closer he will be running for the nearest exit.
5) If you bring him back to your place make sure it is dimly lit. Soft lighting minimizes lines and wrinkles and gives your skin a bit of a glow. Keep candles handy or lamps that have adjustable lighting. In soft lighting you can be his dream woman and you can feel a thousand times better about undressing in front of him.
6) Do a strip tease for him. Now I am not talking about a ten dollar hooker strip tease. I mean a slow undressing. Have him lie on the bed to watch, as you slowly slip out of your dress, then your undies and finally your stockings and shoes. Make him wait a bit.
7)Explore his body in detail. Consider it a five course meal. Drive him absolutely wild by discovering all the hidden spots he didn't even know existed. Most women just lie there and let the guy do all the work. Participate and you have just blown past most of the women he has had sex with.
1) Dress in a way that makes you feel sexy and also flatters your figure. Let's face it some of us look ridiculous in stilettos. Red is almost always a good color. Try a red slinky dress and comfortable undergarments. Those torture devices they sell to suck in our guts look great under the dress but are not sexy at all when you are trying to yank them off for a wild night of pleasure.
2) Pay attention to what he has to say for a change. Yes you can talk about yourself but a man finds it really refreshing when a woman allows him to have his own time in the spotlight.
3) Don't talk about your ex. If he asks, keep it short and sweet. You are starting fresh with this guy. No need to bring in the ghost of past relationships. You are perfect to him in the beginning. There is no reason to make him wonder if the last guy who dumped you was right.
4)Wear a light attractive scent. This means layering scents. Bathe in scented bath oils first. Then apply a light powder in the same scent. Finally spray the same scented perfume in front of you and walk into the mist. Do this about 45 minutes before you see him. If you overpower him with your scent, instead of wanting to edge a bit closer he will be running for the nearest exit.
5) If you bring him back to your place make sure it is dimly lit. Soft lighting minimizes lines and wrinkles and gives your skin a bit of a glow. Keep candles handy or lamps that have adjustable lighting. In soft lighting you can be his dream woman and you can feel a thousand times better about undressing in front of him.
6) Do a strip tease for him. Now I am not talking about a ten dollar hooker strip tease. I mean a slow undressing. Have him lie on the bed to watch, as you slowly slip out of your dress, then your undies and finally your stockings and shoes. Make him wait a bit.
7)Explore his body in detail. Consider it a five course meal. Drive him absolutely wild by discovering all the hidden spots he didn't even know existed. Most women just lie there and let the guy do all the work. Participate and you have just blown past most of the women he has had sex with.
Is 'Sex and the City' Setting You Up for Loneliness?
Is 'Sex and the City' Setting You Up for Loneliness?
A couple of weeks ago, I watched a Sex and the City episode, in which Charlotte, in her never-ending quest to find true love, attends a seminar to teach her how to do just that.
She drags Carrie along, who scoffs at the whole thing. She thinks both the women who got sucked into attending and the seminar leader are sad and ridiculous.
To attract the right men, the crowd is counseled to use affirmations, which Carrie finds preposterous. These suckers actually think they're going to meet guys by reciting a string of useless words!
During the presentation, Charlotte raises her hand to ask the leader a question. She says something like, "I've been using my affirmations, but I still haven't found the right one."
Slightly annoyed, the leader says, you have to get out there, you have to love yourself, and so on.
Carrie grabs the mic from Charlotte and insists, "She is out there."
The leader says something, but Carrie drowns her out, "She is out there."
As far as Carrie's concerned, the seminar is a scam. There are probably no decent men left on the planet. The good ones are married, and the rest have issues.
Now, I enjoy watching Sex and the City. It's fun. It's light. It takes my mind off more serious things.
But it is not real life!
Carrie may discount the power of affirmations, but I didn't. If you aim to attract a wonderful man, you shouldn't, either.
They work.
Even better, they're free.
Indeed, they are one of the most important methods I used to attract the right man for me (who I've been happily married to for almost 13 years).
After years of dating losers, schmoozers, and No-Show Joes, I attracted a loyal, loving, reliable, successful, fun man by using affirmations.
If you want to attract a man who is worthy of you, who will add to your happiness, then decide what qualities you want in a man and write an affirmation in the present tense:
I am happily married to (or in a relationship with) a ____, ____, _____, ______ man.
Write it ten times a day. Recite it in the shower. Repeat it to yourself as you're falling asleep at night.
Give it time. You could start attracting better men within weeks. If you've been hurt or have trouble trusting men, it will take more time.
But keep it up. Keep it to yourself. You'll find out that it's worth it.
By all means, keep watching Sex and the City. Just remember that it's fiction. Few people, men or women, actually behave like its characters in Manhattan or anywhere else.
A couple of weeks ago, I watched a Sex and the City episode, in which Charlotte, in her never-ending quest to find true love, attends a seminar to teach her how to do just that.
She drags Carrie along, who scoffs at the whole thing. She thinks both the women who got sucked into attending and the seminar leader are sad and ridiculous.
To attract the right men, the crowd is counseled to use affirmations, which Carrie finds preposterous. These suckers actually think they're going to meet guys by reciting a string of useless words!
During the presentation, Charlotte raises her hand to ask the leader a question. She says something like, "I've been using my affirmations, but I still haven't found the right one."
Slightly annoyed, the leader says, you have to get out there, you have to love yourself, and so on.
Carrie grabs the mic from Charlotte and insists, "She is out there."
The leader says something, but Carrie drowns her out, "She is out there."
As far as Carrie's concerned, the seminar is a scam. There are probably no decent men left on the planet. The good ones are married, and the rest have issues.
Now, I enjoy watching Sex and the City. It's fun. It's light. It takes my mind off more serious things.
But it is not real life!
Carrie may discount the power of affirmations, but I didn't. If you aim to attract a wonderful man, you shouldn't, either.
They work.
Even better, they're free.
Indeed, they are one of the most important methods I used to attract the right man for me (who I've been happily married to for almost 13 years).
After years of dating losers, schmoozers, and No-Show Joes, I attracted a loyal, loving, reliable, successful, fun man by using affirmations.
If you want to attract a man who is worthy of you, who will add to your happiness, then decide what qualities you want in a man and write an affirmation in the present tense:
I am happily married to (or in a relationship with) a ____, ____, _____, ______ man.
Write it ten times a day. Recite it in the shower. Repeat it to yourself as you're falling asleep at night.
Give it time. You could start attracting better men within weeks. If you've been hurt or have trouble trusting men, it will take more time.
But keep it up. Keep it to yourself. You'll find out that it's worth it.
By all means, keep watching Sex and the City. Just remember that it's fiction. Few people, men or women, actually behave like its characters in Manhattan or anywhere else.
Love at first sight?
Love at first sight?
Yes, men think so...or is it 'lust' at first sight? How can a woman or man 'really' know?
If a woman thinks it is 'love at first sight', she may have found an incredibly 'hot' guy who matches her ideal social persona 'catch'. If this guy actually knows how to be a natural, all women will want him and she will have to fight with others to 'keep him' (I can teach you to be this man).
Otherwise most of them appear to be quite boring because they try to impress her and don't 'get it'. But when dealing with 'love at first sight', yes it might be, but then longer term dynamics start to sink in and kind of spoil it.
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder, I mean, beholder.
'Love at first sight' is usually only perceptionally based if not in its entirety. No one can match up ideally to one person's expectation of who they are or who they should be. Once you find out more about them, you're going to be disappointed in what you thought they were. See how selfish we as people really are?!
Eventually you go through the hardships of a 'real' relationship and very very rarely will everything work out perfectly where the people are a real match (at least in our highly developed, opinionated, individualistic cultural society).
You are only throwing your perception or ideals on who you think that person is or should be (I have done this a lot in the past). We want a person to be the ideal match to what WE think they should be. Most often if not all the time, we find out they are not actually what we idealized and then are a little disappointed. A real relationship is going to take a lot of work and a lot more work than two 'simpler' people.
If you can spark attraction shortly after you meet a woman, there is a more realistic chance she will feel deeper emotions for you than her social persona (of what states what she says she wants) and she will often forgive your other misgivings as long as you understand natural attraction.
This is actually very generous of her because now, guys (way) below her level physically actually have a chance. The process of attraction is slightly different for men and women.
Men will often instantly disqualify women for a sexual relationship based on their looks (ahem), while women keep an open mind to see who knows how to make them 'feel' the feelings that they respond to so powerfully physiologically and emotionally. They are interested in a mans character attributes because that are things that can be of interest for the long haul.
These feelings have a biological root which she cannot choose or control. This is why an average looking guy who 'get's it' can have more of a chance than a good looking guy who easily proves himself wrong to her right away.
She will resent that most of her counterparts do not 'get it' yet but will be open to starting something with a man who finally can just 'lead her through' the natural process of attraction...then often sex 'just happened' or she got 'swept away'..this is the way it is supposed to be and that she fantasizes about (and reads in those sappy romance novels).
Don't be thrown off by what a woman says she wants if you are not that social reflection of her consciousness yourself, she is programmed biologically to react to men who are true naturals with her or who display aspects of being a natural. Do not let that stop you. Her biological inheritance (when in tandem with a true natural man) will override ANY social programming she may have, as long as he maintains true congruency and doesn't 'screw it up'.
If you are a natural you probably won't screw it up when you are reaching that part of her (there is much more leniency here). If you are 'walking on egg shells' by trying to be 'qualified' by her social persona, it's virtually a guarantee you'll screw it up even with any small move. Take the very ending of 'Boat Trip' where Roselyn Sanchez says to the wussy Cuba Gooding, Jr. character, "Ok, but you BETTER not screw it up."
Sure the movie ends with a kiss but who has the control here? Whose reality is he in? Love at first sight, but he is based in the wrong paradigm of 'being' that he WILL screw it up because of the power dynamics and several other factors (she is in control by far).
In fact, you will almost put aside the entire notion of 'love at first sight' because it's too romancey for you (although you may secretly keep that dream alive); but you understand reality a little more, that different relationships with different women are going to give you different experiences.
Of course you may be aware of lust at first sight with women you see most everywhere you go, but you really have to get to know her more to find out who she is, otherwise it is all just perception.
If you can develop yourself to look as good as you can and get your internal paradigm and life straight and clear, then you can naturally accelerate the process of attracting women and starting things with little effort. Your focus should really be on developing yourself and living in a natural paradigm, while denying all of the perceptual B.S. that is going on. Be an interesting and intriguing man and improve yourself; HAVE something to offer women who are lucky enough.
Your 'love at first sight' from their point of view only happens if you match their social ideal (and traditional ideal of Prince Charming) and then know how to take everything from there...then all women will want you. You do not have to be Prince Charming..that is another article, but remember how you relate to her says everything. She needs to be turned up like a volume knob and you have to interact with her to spark the process of sexual attraction and her interest will grow in you...through time, may lead to infatuation, love, great respect, devotion, passion, etc. from her.
It is all in how you relate to her so don't pay too much attention to having to have Brad Pitt looks, with Soros' bank account...that's the same as you wanting to date a supermodel, except you probably have a better chance than she does to meet your ideal because there are so few men left who really get it and are a great catch in their own right (with some nice social status to boot).
There are countless beautiful women. The advantage and favor is in YOUR hands. There are few men left who are awesome catches AND who know how to deal with these women. Make women want you just by being your true self at all times; an interesting, funny, great guy and know how to take it from there (I can help you there as well).
Yes, men think so...or is it 'lust' at first sight? How can a woman or man 'really' know?
If a woman thinks it is 'love at first sight', she may have found an incredibly 'hot' guy who matches her ideal social persona 'catch'. If this guy actually knows how to be a natural, all women will want him and she will have to fight with others to 'keep him' (I can teach you to be this man).
Otherwise most of them appear to be quite boring because they try to impress her and don't 'get it'. But when dealing with 'love at first sight', yes it might be, but then longer term dynamics start to sink in and kind of spoil it.
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder, I mean, beholder.
'Love at first sight' is usually only perceptionally based if not in its entirety. No one can match up ideally to one person's expectation of who they are or who they should be. Once you find out more about them, you're going to be disappointed in what you thought they were. See how selfish we as people really are?!
Eventually you go through the hardships of a 'real' relationship and very very rarely will everything work out perfectly where the people are a real match (at least in our highly developed, opinionated, individualistic cultural society).
You are only throwing your perception or ideals on who you think that person is or should be (I have done this a lot in the past). We want a person to be the ideal match to what WE think they should be. Most often if not all the time, we find out they are not actually what we idealized and then are a little disappointed. A real relationship is going to take a lot of work and a lot more work than two 'simpler' people.
If you can spark attraction shortly after you meet a woman, there is a more realistic chance she will feel deeper emotions for you than her social persona (of what states what she says she wants) and she will often forgive your other misgivings as long as you understand natural attraction.
This is actually very generous of her because now, guys (way) below her level physically actually have a chance. The process of attraction is slightly different for men and women.
Men will often instantly disqualify women for a sexual relationship based on their looks (ahem), while women keep an open mind to see who knows how to make them 'feel' the feelings that they respond to so powerfully physiologically and emotionally. They are interested in a mans character attributes because that are things that can be of interest for the long haul.
These feelings have a biological root which she cannot choose or control. This is why an average looking guy who 'get's it' can have more of a chance than a good looking guy who easily proves himself wrong to her right away.
She will resent that most of her counterparts do not 'get it' yet but will be open to starting something with a man who finally can just 'lead her through' the natural process of attraction...then often sex 'just happened' or she got 'swept away'..this is the way it is supposed to be and that she fantasizes about (and reads in those sappy romance novels).
Don't be thrown off by what a woman says she wants if you are not that social reflection of her consciousness yourself, she is programmed biologically to react to men who are true naturals with her or who display aspects of being a natural. Do not let that stop you. Her biological inheritance (when in tandem with a true natural man) will override ANY social programming she may have, as long as he maintains true congruency and doesn't 'screw it up'.
If you are a natural you probably won't screw it up when you are reaching that part of her (there is much more leniency here). If you are 'walking on egg shells' by trying to be 'qualified' by her social persona, it's virtually a guarantee you'll screw it up even with any small move. Take the very ending of 'Boat Trip' where Roselyn Sanchez says to the wussy Cuba Gooding, Jr. character, "Ok, but you BETTER not screw it up."
Sure the movie ends with a kiss but who has the control here? Whose reality is he in? Love at first sight, but he is based in the wrong paradigm of 'being' that he WILL screw it up because of the power dynamics and several other factors (she is in control by far).
In fact, you will almost put aside the entire notion of 'love at first sight' because it's too romancey for you (although you may secretly keep that dream alive); but you understand reality a little more, that different relationships with different women are going to give you different experiences.
Of course you may be aware of lust at first sight with women you see most everywhere you go, but you really have to get to know her more to find out who she is, otherwise it is all just perception.
If you can develop yourself to look as good as you can and get your internal paradigm and life straight and clear, then you can naturally accelerate the process of attracting women and starting things with little effort. Your focus should really be on developing yourself and living in a natural paradigm, while denying all of the perceptual B.S. that is going on. Be an interesting and intriguing man and improve yourself; HAVE something to offer women who are lucky enough.
Your 'love at first sight' from their point of view only happens if you match their social ideal (and traditional ideal of Prince Charming) and then know how to take everything from there...then all women will want you. You do not have to be Prince Charming..that is another article, but remember how you relate to her says everything. She needs to be turned up like a volume knob and you have to interact with her to spark the process of sexual attraction and her interest will grow in you...through time, may lead to infatuation, love, great respect, devotion, passion, etc. from her.
It is all in how you relate to her so don't pay too much attention to having to have Brad Pitt looks, with Soros' bank account...that's the same as you wanting to date a supermodel, except you probably have a better chance than she does to meet your ideal because there are so few men left who really get it and are a great catch in their own right (with some nice social status to boot).
There are countless beautiful women. The advantage and favor is in YOUR hands. There are few men left who are awesome catches AND who know how to deal with these women. Make women want you just by being your true self at all times; an interesting, funny, great guy and know how to take it from there (I can help you there as well).
Better Orgasm ~ Mouth Action For Him
Better Orgasm ~ Mouth Action For Him
It’s an obvious misnomer to believe that all men think about every day or all the time is sex. The fact is a man’s mind is usually filled with the daily issues of finances, politics, sports especially if their favorite team is losing—and sex.
Women, this is a prime opportunity to get and hold his attention—literally. Giving a guy a hand job is good. Giving him a better orgasm with a little mouth action is even better.
So here are a few techniques to blow…his mind and take him to the peak of ecstasy with an even better orgasm.
As women we are definitely masters at creating a romantic atmosphere. So here are some more ideas on getting the timing right and setting the mood using a few good skills and techniques that will drive your man to a better orgasm. So get ready, be open-minded and add your own creative touches as you surprise him with a better orgasm.
Start by providing scent-ual stimulations. Place his favorite scent between your breast and any other place he likes to nibble. Next, wear sheer lingerie. There’s something about sheer lingerie that stimulates the imagination—send his mind into overdrive.
Undress him and bring him to the edge of a better orgasm by giving him a sensual massage. Use edible oils to lick your way over his body. By the time you’re done, he’ll be begging for you to ride him. But, remember this is his time to have a mind blowing orgasm. Resist the urge to climb on for a wild ride. Now, choose a unique location such as a sturdy chair, have your sensory stimulating toys and edible oils nearby.
Ladies its time to enjoy your treat! Imagine eating an ice cream cone—the licking, sucking and satisfying sounds that you make. Take his erection in hand and lick your way up from the base of penis to the crown. Pay special attention to the crown since the nerve ending are very sensitive to stimulation.
Run your tongue up and down the length of his penis. You can also add a flavored lubricant for added wetness. Take his penis into your mouth with a swallowing motion and pump it back and forth to create rhythmic suction with your mouth.
Turn the heat up for an even better orgasm, add variation by using the tip of your tongue and firmly stroke his penis working your way down to his testicles. Stroke his penis while adding the stimulation of licking his testicles.
Be inventive, run circles around the head of his penis. Alternate your stoking technique. Remember it’s important to vary your sucking and stroking. His hip movements will let you know that he’s enjoying it.
So, what are you going to do when he starts to climax? It’s extremely important to decide this beforehand that way you’re prepared. If you choose to swallow, then keep sucking with gusto showing him that its’ still all about helping him achieve a better orgasm. If you choose not to swallow an alternative is to use an open-mouth technique that allows you to suck as he ejaculates, opening your mouth will allow his load to run down his penis—actually acting as a lubricant.
Ladies, now is the time to let him see what he’s been missing…a better orgasm that will take him to the pinnacles of sexual pleasure. A better orgasm is not just about sex, it’s about unleashing primal desires, wild fantasies…turning him on. Now that you’ve learned a terrific technique for giving him a little mouth action practice it—he will definitely be a willing participant.
Get Married to a Guy You Can Have Fun With Forever
Get Married to a Guy You Can Have Fun With Forever
How often do your married friends complain about husbands who spend weekends on the couch watching games? Didn't they notice these guys were sports fanatics while they were dating? Did they think things would change after the wedding?
Life is fraught with ups and downs, so it's critical to marry someone you can have fun with, today and fifty years from now. Here's how you can find that person:
1. Write down a list of the things you like to do. Then do them. I have a theory that if all the singles who claim to enjoy long walks on the beach actually took long walks on the beach, they'd meet, get married, and the personal ad industry would collapse.
If you like to read, hang out in a bookstore. If the bookstore has a cafe, become a regular there. If you like beer and bands, grab a friend and get to know the faces at a neighborhood bar (take a cab; no drinking and driving, please).
Do what you like to do.
This technique worked for a good friend of mine. After discovering that his longtime girlfriend had been cheating on him, he left her. Then he gave himself time to mourn and moved on.
He had two hobbies, cooking and hiking. He enrolled in a cooking class and joined a hiking club, in the hopes of widening his social circle. After the cooking class ended, he invited his classmates to a party at his house and encouraged them to bring friends. Guess who showed up? A fun, attractive (and faithful!) woman who enjoys entertaining and good food as much as he does. They've been married three years now.
2. Write down a list of things you'd like to do but haven't gotten around to yet. Would you like to build a bookcase? Check out the list of classes at your local Home Depot. Want to learn how to fix your transmission? Take an auto repair course. Women are bound to meet men there. If you're bent on improving your money management skills, take a finance course. You'll likely meet smart, upwardly mobile people.
The key to attracting a husband who you can have fun with 10, 25, and 50 years from now is to do the things that make you happy today.
How often do your married friends complain about husbands who spend weekends on the couch watching games? Didn't they notice these guys were sports fanatics while they were dating? Did they think things would change after the wedding?
Life is fraught with ups and downs, so it's critical to marry someone you can have fun with, today and fifty years from now. Here's how you can find that person:
1. Write down a list of the things you like to do. Then do them. I have a theory that if all the singles who claim to enjoy long walks on the beach actually took long walks on the beach, they'd meet, get married, and the personal ad industry would collapse.
If you like to read, hang out in a bookstore. If the bookstore has a cafe, become a regular there. If you like beer and bands, grab a friend and get to know the faces at a neighborhood bar (take a cab; no drinking and driving, please).
Do what you like to do.
This technique worked for a good friend of mine. After discovering that his longtime girlfriend had been cheating on him, he left her. Then he gave himself time to mourn and moved on.
He had two hobbies, cooking and hiking. He enrolled in a cooking class and joined a hiking club, in the hopes of widening his social circle. After the cooking class ended, he invited his classmates to a party at his house and encouraged them to bring friends. Guess who showed up? A fun, attractive (and faithful!) woman who enjoys entertaining and good food as much as he does. They've been married three years now.
2. Write down a list of things you'd like to do but haven't gotten around to yet. Would you like to build a bookcase? Check out the list of classes at your local Home Depot. Want to learn how to fix your transmission? Take an auto repair course. Women are bound to meet men there. If you're bent on improving your money management skills, take a finance course. You'll likely meet smart, upwardly mobile people.
The key to attracting a husband who you can have fun with 10, 25, and 50 years from now is to do the things that make you happy today.
Female Self Pleasuring Tips For The Adventurous Woman
Female Self Pleasuring Tips For The Adventurous Woman
Unlike men, whose sex organs are available for self pleasure by stroking and stimulating any time of the day, women have to contrive to entice their clitoris out of hiding and available for pleasuring. One of the most common female self pleasuring tips is the use of sex toys and gadgets.
Luckily for us, female self pleasure toys can be found in our very own kitchen. Sure, jokes have been made about this, but it’s true. The usual suspects here are any penis-like vegetables and fruits, like carrots, cucumbers or zucchinis. Bananas are too soft to do the trick. Sometimes, un-penis-like fruits and vegetables can create another type of female self pleasure as a form of taste aphrodisiac: cherries, grapes, or sections of oranges. Feel free to use different female self pleasure techniques to enhance your arousal. Inserting any of the penis-like items inside your vulva, as you would a dildo will add to your self pleasure. As a female self pleasure technique, the use of fruits and vegetables has a lot going for it: It will not endanger you physically, in contrast to, for example, using a bottle, which might break inside you, or, a piece of wood, which might splinter--ouch! I am not sure that anyone has ever used an open bottle for this purpose, but it is worth cautioning all women against it: An open bottle will form a-suction inside you and it would be quite impossible to remove it without the embarrassment of explaining to a doctor why you are depositing strange objects inside your vagina.
After you’ve pleasured yourself with just about everything you can from your fridge, you might want to try a dildo. Dildos have been manufactured to be sold and used especially for female self pleasuring. They were not merely created to aid men in their sexual fantasies when they watch all those erotic movies. Erotic movies, however, are very informative when it comes to learning how to use dildos. Use a dildo to massage your clitoris and slide it in and out and around your vagina. Even better are the men, who possess the lingual skillfulness similar to a dildo but more importantly, they are selfless enough to aspire to that ability. Either way, these great female self pleasuring techniques will open up a whole new world of female self pleasuring ideas.
Unlike men, whose sex organs are available for self pleasure by stroking and stimulating any time of the day, women have to contrive to entice their clitoris out of hiding and available for pleasuring. One of the most common female self pleasuring tips is the use of sex toys and gadgets.
Luckily for us, female self pleasure toys can be found in our very own kitchen. Sure, jokes have been made about this, but it’s true. The usual suspects here are any penis-like vegetables and fruits, like carrots, cucumbers or zucchinis. Bananas are too soft to do the trick. Sometimes, un-penis-like fruits and vegetables can create another type of female self pleasure as a form of taste aphrodisiac: cherries, grapes, or sections of oranges. Feel free to use different female self pleasure techniques to enhance your arousal. Inserting any of the penis-like items inside your vulva, as you would a dildo will add to your self pleasure. As a female self pleasure technique, the use of fruits and vegetables has a lot going for it: It will not endanger you physically, in contrast to, for example, using a bottle, which might break inside you, or, a piece of wood, which might splinter--ouch! I am not sure that anyone has ever used an open bottle for this purpose, but it is worth cautioning all women against it: An open bottle will form a-suction inside you and it would be quite impossible to remove it without the embarrassment of explaining to a doctor why you are depositing strange objects inside your vagina.
After you’ve pleasured yourself with just about everything you can from your fridge, you might want to try a dildo. Dildos have been manufactured to be sold and used especially for female self pleasuring. They were not merely created to aid men in their sexual fantasies when they watch all those erotic movies. Erotic movies, however, are very informative when it comes to learning how to use dildos. Use a dildo to massage your clitoris and slide it in and out and around your vagina. Even better are the men, who possess the lingual skillfulness similar to a dildo but more importantly, they are selfless enough to aspire to that ability. Either way, these great female self pleasuring techniques will open up a whole new world of female self pleasuring ideas.
Is it Lust or Love -- How to Tell the Difference
Is it Lust or Love -- How to Tell the Difference
Far too many people, both men and women alike, confuse lust for love. Physical attraction alone will not withstand the test of time in relationships. Physical attraction is an important factor but must never be the only factor you rely upon when choosing a mate. Many make the mistake of confusing lust and love and end up broken-hearted when the relationship doesn't last.
Perhaps you're wildly attracted to someone and thoughts of that person dominate your mind a good portion of the day and night. Perhaps you can't wait until the next time the two of you will be together again. When you are together you can't keep your hands off one another and when you're apart, you fantasize about the next time you can see one another. True love and lust are easily confused because they are so much alike.
As a rule of thumb, if you share few other interests and have nothing in common other than an overwhelming physical desire for one another...it may be lust. If you have nothing of real value to say to one another and have difficulty relating to one another outside the sexual arena...it may be lust. If you don't particularly enjoy one another's company unless you're having sex...it may be lust.
On the other hand, if your relationship is based on factors other than physical attraction and sex is not necessarily the number one priority...it may be love. Most long-term relationships are built on a strong friendship which turns into love over time. Having sex is not the driving force behind the relationship, but is a nice sideline to it.
There really is such a thing as "love at first sight". It happens to many people and the relationship may last for the rest of their lives. A budding relationship based on lust feels much the same as one which is truly "love at first sight". So how do you tell the difference?
Ask yourself the following questions. Read each question carefully and really think about it before answering. When answering, try to be as truthful as possible. If you can honestly and sincerely answer "yes" to all or nearly all of the questions, it may be safe to assume what you feel for the other person is actually love and not merely lust.
Keep in mind, these questions are quite general and are in no way a total and complete checklist.
1. Do you share similar ethics, values, and morals?
2. Do you find it easy to talk to one another and can you talk freely about almost anything?
3. Do you enjoy the time you spend with one another, regardless of the activity?
4. Do you enjoy even the most mundane activities when you are together, simply because you ARE together?
5. Do you have a genuine concern for the happiness, safety, and well-being of the other person?
6. Are you able to work out any differences you may have with this person to the satisfaction of both of you?
7. When disagreements arise, are you able to discuss them openly and frankly without losing your temper?
8. Do you find yourself longing for this person's presence in your life in terms other than a sexual relationship? In other words, do you feel a need simply to be with that person and spend time with them even without having sex?
9. Can you laugh together and at one another, share jokes, and generally have fun together?
10. Does spending time with this person make you feel good about yourself?
11. Does this person give you a heightened sense of self-confidence and vitality?
12. Can you look at this person even when they are at their worst in their physical appearance (such as when they are sick) and not feel repulsed?
13. Do you share a strong mutual respect for one another?
14. Are you willing and able to share both good times and bad with this person and work through life's ups and downs together as a team?
There is a very fine line between lust and love because the two of them are closely related. Being able to tell the difference can save you from wasting your time pursuing an unhealthy relationship which is doomed to eventual failure.
If your long-term goal is to seek out a partner with whom you can build a solid, lifetime commitment, knowing the difference between lust and love is an essential and vital skill you'll want to master. Learning to accept a relationship for what it really is can mean the difference between a broken heart and a happy, fulfilling, lifetime of bliss with your partner.
Far too many people, both men and women alike, confuse lust for love. Physical attraction alone will not withstand the test of time in relationships. Physical attraction is an important factor but must never be the only factor you rely upon when choosing a mate. Many make the mistake of confusing lust and love and end up broken-hearted when the relationship doesn't last.
Perhaps you're wildly attracted to someone and thoughts of that person dominate your mind a good portion of the day and night. Perhaps you can't wait until the next time the two of you will be together again. When you are together you can't keep your hands off one another and when you're apart, you fantasize about the next time you can see one another. True love and lust are easily confused because they are so much alike.
As a rule of thumb, if you share few other interests and have nothing in common other than an overwhelming physical desire for one another...it may be lust. If you have nothing of real value to say to one another and have difficulty relating to one another outside the sexual arena...it may be lust. If you don't particularly enjoy one another's company unless you're having sex...it may be lust.
On the other hand, if your relationship is based on factors other than physical attraction and sex is not necessarily the number one priority...it may be love. Most long-term relationships are built on a strong friendship which turns into love over time. Having sex is not the driving force behind the relationship, but is a nice sideline to it.
There really is such a thing as "love at first sight". It happens to many people and the relationship may last for the rest of their lives. A budding relationship based on lust feels much the same as one which is truly "love at first sight". So how do you tell the difference?
Ask yourself the following questions. Read each question carefully and really think about it before answering. When answering, try to be as truthful as possible. If you can honestly and sincerely answer "yes" to all or nearly all of the questions, it may be safe to assume what you feel for the other person is actually love and not merely lust.
Keep in mind, these questions are quite general and are in no way a total and complete checklist.
1. Do you share similar ethics, values, and morals?
2. Do you find it easy to talk to one another and can you talk freely about almost anything?
3. Do you enjoy the time you spend with one another, regardless of the activity?
4. Do you enjoy even the most mundane activities when you are together, simply because you ARE together?
5. Do you have a genuine concern for the happiness, safety, and well-being of the other person?
6. Are you able to work out any differences you may have with this person to the satisfaction of both of you?
7. When disagreements arise, are you able to discuss them openly and frankly without losing your temper?
8. Do you find yourself longing for this person's presence in your life in terms other than a sexual relationship? In other words, do you feel a need simply to be with that person and spend time with them even without having sex?
9. Can you laugh together and at one another, share jokes, and generally have fun together?
10. Does spending time with this person make you feel good about yourself?
11. Does this person give you a heightened sense of self-confidence and vitality?
12. Can you look at this person even when they are at their worst in their physical appearance (such as when they are sick) and not feel repulsed?
13. Do you share a strong mutual respect for one another?
14. Are you willing and able to share both good times and bad with this person and work through life's ups and downs together as a team?
There is a very fine line between lust and love because the two of them are closely related. Being able to tell the difference can save you from wasting your time pursuing an unhealthy relationship which is doomed to eventual failure.
If your long-term goal is to seek out a partner with whom you can build a solid, lifetime commitment, knowing the difference between lust and love is an essential and vital skill you'll want to master. Learning to accept a relationship for what it really is can mean the difference between a broken heart and a happy, fulfilling, lifetime of bliss with your partner.
7 Ways to Make Yourself Irresistable
7 Ways to Make Yourself Irresistable
The key to being irresistable to men is more about you and less
about them.
It is about accentuating every one of your strengths both
internally and externally and reveling in them.
So before we show you how to flirt, tease and seduce, we are going to teach you how to pamper, indulge and revel in the delicious power of being a woman.
1) Before going out to socialize or even see the one that you are currently dating, take a few minutes to visualize what you want to happen. Picture in detail exactly who you want and what you want to happen between you. What qualities will your perfect lover have?
How will he look at you? How will he touch you? Add in as much
detail as possible. Knowing what you want is the first step to
having it.
2) Before seeing the man you are dating or stepping foot outside the door, take care with your appearance. Look in the mirror and identify all the things that you like about yourself. If you focus on the qualities that you like about yourself, you will have far more confidence in yourself than most women out there. That will show and give you an edge.
3) Accentuate those positive qualities.
For example: If you have full shiny hair make the most of it. Let
it flow down your shoulders. Play with it in front of the one you
desire. Men have a fascination with hair.
If you have full pouty lips, apply liner around the edges then fill
in with a deep gloss that accentuates your skin tone, then apply a lighter coat just in the center of your lips. This will give them
even more sex appeal.
4) Play up your eyes. A lot of flirting is done with eye play. Look
at him then look away. Use your eyes to tell him everything that
you are feeling, everything that you would like to do to him.
5)Wear clothes that accentuate your assets. Hint at your curves
without exposing them. Remember less is more. Incite his curiosity. Make him want to see more.
6) Wear a delicate scent. Apply your perfume twenty minutes before you go out the door. A woman's scent is enticing. Overpowering perfume, on the other hand, is a major turn off.
7) Take care of your whole body, not just your face. Most women wash their face daily and moisturize but what about the rest of you? Take care of your skin. Use a good sugar scrub on your body and follow with a rich moisturizer. If your body feels silky smooth, you will feel and act sexier. Plus the man of your dreams won't be able to resist caressing your smooth, silky soft skin.
The key to being irresistable to men is more about you and less
about them.
It is about accentuating every one of your strengths both
internally and externally and reveling in them.
So before we show you how to flirt, tease and seduce, we are going to teach you how to pamper, indulge and revel in the delicious power of being a woman.
1) Before going out to socialize or even see the one that you are currently dating, take a few minutes to visualize what you want to happen. Picture in detail exactly who you want and what you want to happen between you. What qualities will your perfect lover have?
How will he look at you? How will he touch you? Add in as much
detail as possible. Knowing what you want is the first step to
having it.
2) Before seeing the man you are dating or stepping foot outside the door, take care with your appearance. Look in the mirror and identify all the things that you like about yourself. If you focus on the qualities that you like about yourself, you will have far more confidence in yourself than most women out there. That will show and give you an edge.
3) Accentuate those positive qualities.
For example: If you have full shiny hair make the most of it. Let
it flow down your shoulders. Play with it in front of the one you
desire. Men have a fascination with hair.
If you have full pouty lips, apply liner around the edges then fill
in with a deep gloss that accentuates your skin tone, then apply a lighter coat just in the center of your lips. This will give them
even more sex appeal.
4) Play up your eyes. A lot of flirting is done with eye play. Look
at him then look away. Use your eyes to tell him everything that
you are feeling, everything that you would like to do to him.
5)Wear clothes that accentuate your assets. Hint at your curves
without exposing them. Remember less is more. Incite his curiosity. Make him want to see more.
6) Wear a delicate scent. Apply your perfume twenty minutes before you go out the door. A woman's scent is enticing. Overpowering perfume, on the other hand, is a major turn off.
7) Take care of your whole body, not just your face. Most women wash their face daily and moisturize but what about the rest of you? Take care of your skin. Use a good sugar scrub on your body and follow with a rich moisturizer. If your body feels silky smooth, you will feel and act sexier. Plus the man of your dreams won't be able to resist caressing your smooth, silky soft skin.
Online Dating Tips
Online Dating Tips
Finding your soul mate online is a wondrous thing; however, there is the potential for danger. While you have access to a wide variety of people, you also have the impending complication of meeting those who are not what they seem to be--there are some tips of the trade, though, to help you become more discerning with your choices. These tips can help you stay safe and stay away from men and women who are not what you’re looking for.
Tip One: Start Slowly. There are all kinds of people on the Love Empire; not all of these people, however, will be right for you. Take your time--if you meet someone and start up a conversation, proceed with discretion. The person at the other end may not be who they claim to be; take your time and watch for inconsistencies or odd behavior. If something bothers you, simply walk away. Do not rush into any relationship without thinking first.
Tip Two: Protect Your Identity. One of the benefits of dating online is that you can get to know someone based solely upon their personality and not deal with the more social conscious real world. It is up to you to decide when and how you reveal who you really are--be careful, however. If someone receives your personal information, they could use it against you. If a member tries to pressure you into giving out your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information, then walk away.
Tip Three: Use Common Sense. When speaking to someone through the Love Empire, do not throw good judgment away simply because this is an online service. What may sound wonderful on the screen can be masking something not so wonderful in reality. Use caution and do not fall in love with the first profile you read. Take your time and go through all of your potential choices. Then, after you’ve researched enough, go from there. It is a common occurrence for people to “fall in love” after only one conversation. Do not do this! Retain your common sense and view online dating as you view real-world dating. You do not have to love every profile you read.
Tip Four: Request A Photo. If you meet someone, chat with them, and see the beginning of a relationship forming, then you might want to request a photo. Often, this can tell you more about the person than any email or instant message. First of all, it can keep them from lying about their looks; secondly, you will know if you’re attracted to them in the physical sense; finally, if they continually refuse to send a photo, there might be a reason other than embarrassment. Proceed carefully.
Tip Five: Pay Attention. This is, possibly, the most important tip you could follow. In an email, any one can sound wonderful--in real life, it’s much more difficult. When you are becoming involved with someone on the Love Empire, watch for ‘red flags’, or odd behavior. For example, if during an online session, your date suddenly becomes angry or aggressive toward you and then, won’t explain why, you should take this into consideration. If one sentence could upset him/her in such a way, it might be cause to worry. Also, pay attention to any attempts to pressure or control you. For instance, if your date is constantly making demeaning comments about you, there is a strong chance that he/she is trying to manipulate you into feeling inferior; therefore, you become an easier target to control. Finally, watch out for inconsistencies with information that your date provides you or evasive answers to questions. If your date displays any of the following problems, it would be well-advised to reconsider your relationship:
1. He/she provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc.
2. He/she refuses to speak to you on the phone after you have established an
3. online relationship; or, he/she will only speak on a strangely specific
4. timeframe.
5. He/she will not answer any direct questions about themselves. They will
6. either give you a vague answer or will simply turn the question back to you.
7. He/she will only provide photos of large groups of people, making it
8. impossible for you to find them.
Finding your soul mate online is a wondrous thing; however, there is the potential for danger. While you have access to a wide variety of people, you also have the impending complication of meeting those who are not what they seem to be--there are some tips of the trade, though, to help you become more discerning with your choices. These tips can help you stay safe and stay away from men and women who are not what you’re looking for.
Tip One: Start Slowly. There are all kinds of people on the Love Empire; not all of these people, however, will be right for you. Take your time--if you meet someone and start up a conversation, proceed with discretion. The person at the other end may not be who they claim to be; take your time and watch for inconsistencies or odd behavior. If something bothers you, simply walk away. Do not rush into any relationship without thinking first.
Tip Two: Protect Your Identity. One of the benefits of dating online is that you can get to know someone based solely upon their personality and not deal with the more social conscious real world. It is up to you to decide when and how you reveal who you really are--be careful, however. If someone receives your personal information, they could use it against you. If a member tries to pressure you into giving out your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information, then walk away.
Tip Three: Use Common Sense. When speaking to someone through the Love Empire, do not throw good judgment away simply because this is an online service. What may sound wonderful on the screen can be masking something not so wonderful in reality. Use caution and do not fall in love with the first profile you read. Take your time and go through all of your potential choices. Then, after you’ve researched enough, go from there. It is a common occurrence for people to “fall in love” after only one conversation. Do not do this! Retain your common sense and view online dating as you view real-world dating. You do not have to love every profile you read.
Tip Four: Request A Photo. If you meet someone, chat with them, and see the beginning of a relationship forming, then you might want to request a photo. Often, this can tell you more about the person than any email or instant message. First of all, it can keep them from lying about their looks; secondly, you will know if you’re attracted to them in the physical sense; finally, if they continually refuse to send a photo, there might be a reason other than embarrassment. Proceed carefully.
Tip Five: Pay Attention. This is, possibly, the most important tip you could follow. In an email, any one can sound wonderful--in real life, it’s much more difficult. When you are becoming involved with someone on the Love Empire, watch for ‘red flags’, or odd behavior. For example, if during an online session, your date suddenly becomes angry or aggressive toward you and then, won’t explain why, you should take this into consideration. If one sentence could upset him/her in such a way, it might be cause to worry. Also, pay attention to any attempts to pressure or control you. For instance, if your date is constantly making demeaning comments about you, there is a strong chance that he/she is trying to manipulate you into feeling inferior; therefore, you become an easier target to control. Finally, watch out for inconsistencies with information that your date provides you or evasive answers to questions. If your date displays any of the following problems, it would be well-advised to reconsider your relationship:
1. He/she provides inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc.
2. He/she refuses to speak to you on the phone after you have established an
3. online relationship; or, he/she will only speak on a strangely specific
4. timeframe.
5. He/she will not answer any direct questions about themselves. They will
6. either give you a vague answer or will simply turn the question back to you.
7. He/she will only provide photos of large groups of people, making it
8. impossible for you to find them.
Online Dating Made Easy and Safe
As technology becomes more ingrained in our everyday lives, more people are turning to the Internet for social purposes. And over the past few years, this has become a more accepted form of communication. Friendships are formed and relationships made online.
But just how much trouble is it to join the online dating sites? And is it safe?
A few years ago, there was significant attention placed on those who turned to online dating. Consumers were warned that the sites were unsafe, used by predators who were looking for victims. But increased attention to security and awareness on the part of those using the services has made an incredible difference.
Many of the dating sites are now offering members ways to talk anonymously at first, then allowed to meet via web cam in private chat rooms. With the web cam options, it's more difficult to hide things like age.
Some sites also screen members personally. While the sites make no claims that they've gone so far as to perform background checks, they do often verify addresses and other information. Again, this isn't a full-fledged safety net, just one more precaution toward making online dating safer.
As more people are becoming completely comfortable with online communication and more people have access to Internet at home and at work, online dating sites have flourished. There are many sites that have very short sign-up processes and others that require you to answer lots of questions.
You'll typically be allowed to register for free, though you have to pay dues in order to gain access to other members' contact information. This is how the sites are able to boast that they have thousands of profiles available. Since it's free to sign up and post your information and photo, many people take that step with no intentions of going further.
If you're considering joining an online dating service, check out the membership requirements first. If security is important, take time to read what steps the dating service has taken to ensure the safety of its members.
Above all, take time to protect yourself. Remember that not everyone is honest. Just as you could meet a person on a park bench that offers lies about his or her life, you'll meet some people at online dating sites that are also untruthful. But you may also meet the love you've been looking for.
But just how much trouble is it to join the online dating sites? And is it safe?
A few years ago, there was significant attention placed on those who turned to online dating. Consumers were warned that the sites were unsafe, used by predators who were looking for victims. But increased attention to security and awareness on the part of those using the services has made an incredible difference.
Many of the dating sites are now offering members ways to talk anonymously at first, then allowed to meet via web cam in private chat rooms. With the web cam options, it's more difficult to hide things like age.
Some sites also screen members personally. While the sites make no claims that they've gone so far as to perform background checks, they do often verify addresses and other information. Again, this isn't a full-fledged safety net, just one more precaution toward making online dating safer.
As more people are becoming completely comfortable with online communication and more people have access to Internet at home and at work, online dating sites have flourished. There are many sites that have very short sign-up processes and others that require you to answer lots of questions.
You'll typically be allowed to register for free, though you have to pay dues in order to gain access to other members' contact information. This is how the sites are able to boast that they have thousands of profiles available. Since it's free to sign up and post your information and photo, many people take that step with no intentions of going further.
If you're considering joining an online dating service, check out the membership requirements first. If security is important, take time to read what steps the dating service has taken to ensure the safety of its members.
Above all, take time to protect yourself. Remember that not everyone is honest. Just as you could meet a person on a park bench that offers lies about his or her life, you'll meet some people at online dating sites that are also untruthful. But you may also meet the love you've been looking for.
10 Reasons to Use Online Dating Sites
There are many more reasons than just ten that I would like to mention, but in this article I have focussed on the primary ten reasons why I believe on-line dating is here to stay. It is now understood that the industry has even further to grow as more and more service suppliers in this segment realize the many niches yet to be serviced and explored. If you are concerned about your time, privacy or safety, while using On-line Dating, then this is a 'must read'.
1.Most people are pretty busy these days. You can imagine how many times you would have to go out and socialize before finding the right partner. Then consider how much you end up spending week after week. You may meet the right person the first time you go out, but you and I know that this is highly unlikely. This procedure more often than not ends up in a lot of wasted time and a lot of wasted money too. However, dating sites(in general) cost nothing to register and or search.
2.Dating sites (the good ones) are in the main, free to join. Only costing you money when you have linked up with someone and intend on meeting with them or communicating further. This is a great feature because it means you will be aware of the basic geography, the hobbies, nuances, hobbies, and other interests before you meet. This is so much less time consuming than dating different people over and over before you find that 'right' person or even just the essential pieces of information.
3.From time to time you can also place advertisements on these sites which stimulates response and gives you a wider field to choose from.
4.You can remain anonymous (recommended) and protect your identity until you're ready and comfortable enough to disclose who you reallly are. If you decide the other person is not for you, you can easily and tactfully end communication without any animosity or even further contact.
5.Some people moving to a new location like to establish relationships and friend before they arrive at their new abode, allowing settling in to be that much easier. This is very often relevant to single parents. There are sites out there that are specific to single parents dating which make the job of meeting that much easier.
6.You may be having difficulty meeting people of the same faith or religion. In this case, there are niche dating sites that service this need in almost every major religion or faith.
7.Equally important is the need to service alternative dating requirements for those who seek pursuits outside the mainstream world of dating. There are many sites to choose from in this category to a point where choosing a good alternative dating service can become confusing and almost frustrating. Look for a Dating Site Review Service to assist you with this. Most of these service sites will have carried out some reviews in addition to weeding out the good from the not so good. If you don't find a particular site on a dating site review service it usually means the owners were uncomfortable with the site and will not include it in their pages or they haven't got around to reviewing it as yet - If the latter is the case, send them an email asking them to review that particular site. Most will follow through and you will find a review in as little as a few days in some cases. If it does not turn up on their pages, there could be something wrong with it.
8.Adult dating also falls into the above category due to its large following. Fortunately, the same solution applies. Just find a dating site review service that has done the 'hard yards' on your behalf and click away. The good review sites are free and will guide you to the better service suppliers.
9.On the subject of Dating Site Review Services, some of them supply newsletters which keep you informed and up to date on new services, promotions (ie.Romance Tours, Dating Events and Speed Dating etc.) and of course other exciting freebies. It is always worth subscribing because you can always unsubscribe if you want to. Just make sure they mention that in their 'sign up box'. Some independent sites have their own newsletters but common sense tells you that you are more likely to receive a more diverse range of information and promotions from the Dating Site Review Service than from just one independent dating site. This occurs because they will screen a whole swag of offers from a host of sites rather than just one before they onsend them to you.
10.Another cool free service from responsible dating sites and review services are the articles which frequently guide you in the right direction with dating trends and tips for successful dating and romance.
I hope this article has opened you eyes to just a few of the many benefits and features that can be obtained when using dating sites to help you.
Enjoy!
1.Most people are pretty busy these days. You can imagine how many times you would have to go out and socialize before finding the right partner. Then consider how much you end up spending week after week. You may meet the right person the first time you go out, but you and I know that this is highly unlikely. This procedure more often than not ends up in a lot of wasted time and a lot of wasted money too. However, dating sites(in general) cost nothing to register and or search.
2.Dating sites (the good ones) are in the main, free to join. Only costing you money when you have linked up with someone and intend on meeting with them or communicating further. This is a great feature because it means you will be aware of the basic geography, the hobbies, nuances, hobbies, and other interests before you meet. This is so much less time consuming than dating different people over and over before you find that 'right' person or even just the essential pieces of information.
3.From time to time you can also place advertisements on these sites which stimulates response and gives you a wider field to choose from.
4.You can remain anonymous (recommended) and protect your identity until you're ready and comfortable enough to disclose who you reallly are. If you decide the other person is not for you, you can easily and tactfully end communication without any animosity or even further contact.
5.Some people moving to a new location like to establish relationships and friend before they arrive at their new abode, allowing settling in to be that much easier. This is very often relevant to single parents. There are sites out there that are specific to single parents dating which make the job of meeting that much easier.
6.You may be having difficulty meeting people of the same faith or religion. In this case, there are niche dating sites that service this need in almost every major religion or faith.
7.Equally important is the need to service alternative dating requirements for those who seek pursuits outside the mainstream world of dating. There are many sites to choose from in this category to a point where choosing a good alternative dating service can become confusing and almost frustrating. Look for a Dating Site Review Service to assist you with this. Most of these service sites will have carried out some reviews in addition to weeding out the good from the not so good. If you don't find a particular site on a dating site review service it usually means the owners were uncomfortable with the site and will not include it in their pages or they haven't got around to reviewing it as yet - If the latter is the case, send them an email asking them to review that particular site. Most will follow through and you will find a review in as little as a few days in some cases. If it does not turn up on their pages, there could be something wrong with it.
8.Adult dating also falls into the above category due to its large following. Fortunately, the same solution applies. Just find a dating site review service that has done the 'hard yards' on your behalf and click away. The good review sites are free and will guide you to the better service suppliers.
9.On the subject of Dating Site Review Services, some of them supply newsletters which keep you informed and up to date on new services, promotions (ie.Romance Tours, Dating Events and Speed Dating etc.) and of course other exciting freebies. It is always worth subscribing because you can always unsubscribe if you want to. Just make sure they mention that in their 'sign up box'. Some independent sites have their own newsletters but common sense tells you that you are more likely to receive a more diverse range of information and promotions from the Dating Site Review Service than from just one independent dating site. This occurs because they will screen a whole swag of offers from a host of sites rather than just one before they onsend them to you.
10.Another cool free service from responsible dating sites and review services are the articles which frequently guide you in the right direction with dating trends and tips for successful dating and romance.
I hope this article has opened you eyes to just a few of the many benefits and features that can be obtained when using dating sites to help you.
Enjoy!
Dating Online - The new way to meet people
A lot has changed since the days of matchmaking and escorted evenings out. Dating in the 21st century has taken many turns, among these the emerging popularity of meeting partners online.
Online dating has many benefits. The shy dater can open up and get to know a person without having to deal with first-date jitters that often come from fear of the unknown. By the time he or she meets the potential paramour, they have already established a comfort level that allows the date to flow much more smoothly.
At the other end of the spectrum, social butterflies love online dating because of the number of fish in the sea. With so many people to choose from, booking several dates in a short amount of time is easy. Online dating allows you to be discreet, and it also enables you to be choosy. You choose partners based on common interests gleaned from dating profiles. This is an attractive alternative to approaching a potential mate in a bar going on looks alone.
As the online dating community has grown, so too have the number of vendors willing to help you promote yourself. Professional writers and photographers offer services to assist you with your dating profile. They hawk services to help you attract more hits to your online profile, which obviously helps lead to more dating options.
Dating websites vary. Some require a fee to enjoy certain benefits, such as the ability to post a picture or short video. Other dating sites offer free private e-mail accounts and access to thousands of profiles without paying a dime. When engaging in online dating, however, it is important to exercise caution.
Remember that anyone with Internet access has access to these sites. It is virtually impossible for dating sites to weed out the bad seeds; the online dater must take care in setting up dates with strangers. When first meeting face-to-face, choose a public place. Don't divulge too much information until you have a good idea of the person's character. Be careful not to tell too much too soon. With a responsible attitude and an open mind, online dating can be fun, safe, and exciting.
Online dating has many benefits. The shy dater can open up and get to know a person without having to deal with first-date jitters that often come from fear of the unknown. By the time he or she meets the potential paramour, they have already established a comfort level that allows the date to flow much more smoothly.
At the other end of the spectrum, social butterflies love online dating because of the number of fish in the sea. With so many people to choose from, booking several dates in a short amount of time is easy. Online dating allows you to be discreet, and it also enables you to be choosy. You choose partners based on common interests gleaned from dating profiles. This is an attractive alternative to approaching a potential mate in a bar going on looks alone.
As the online dating community has grown, so too have the number of vendors willing to help you promote yourself. Professional writers and photographers offer services to assist you with your dating profile. They hawk services to help you attract more hits to your online profile, which obviously helps lead to more dating options.
Dating websites vary. Some require a fee to enjoy certain benefits, such as the ability to post a picture or short video. Other dating sites offer free private e-mail accounts and access to thousands of profiles without paying a dime. When engaging in online dating, however, it is important to exercise caution.
Remember that anyone with Internet access has access to these sites. It is virtually impossible for dating sites to weed out the bad seeds; the online dater must take care in setting up dates with strangers. When first meeting face-to-face, choose a public place. Don't divulge too much information until you have a good idea of the person's character. Be careful not to tell too much too soon. With a responsible attitude and an open mind, online dating can be fun, safe, and exciting.
Dating Advice: Love Shouldn't Hurt
"Because when pain has been intertwined with love and closeness, it's very difficult to believe that love and closeness can be experienced without pain." -Gloria Steinem, "Revolution from Within."
If you tend to attract men who disappoint you (by cheating on you, not showing up when they say they will, or just refusing to get off the couch), you may be confusing love with pain.
So many of us have been brought up to believe that pain is normal, even expected, in a love relationship. Without it, the relationship seems flat, boring. We crave drama. (Why is it that so many women have great sex after a fight with a significant other?)
A happy, loving relationship eludes us because we don't recognize it when we see it, or because we simply believe it's not possible (News Flash: According to a recent Today Show, all men lie. All of them! I wasn't aware that men have a monopoly on lying or other bad behavior. I know some women who are breathtaking liars. Don't you?).
According to the media, men are incapable of remembering birthdays, being monogamous, getting through a weekend unless they're transfixed before a marathon of football games. Women internalize these messages: That's the way men are. That's the way life is. Get over it.
And while the media is happy to sell us the myth of the unattainable happy relationship, some of us have come to believe in it because of our own experiences.
Some of us:
(a) Had parents who treated each other indifferently, (b) had parents who outright hated each other, (c) had fathers who ignored us as children, (d) had a parent who suffered from alcoholism, (e) had mothers who would rather have been doing something else, or (f) had a parent who suffered from a mental illness.
And so, we learned to associate love with pain. It's all we knew.
Others among us grew up in perfectly happy homes with parents who loved each other and delighted in us, but we still managed to:
(a) Internalize negative messages we heard from our friends' parents who were unhappily married, or
(b) Internalize negative messages we saw elsewhere (I know a woman who, during her impressionable teenage years, babysat for a couple who gave each other the silent treatment and expected her to relay messages. She also babysat for another family, where the father once came home early and started reading a porn magazine!).
As a result of this programming, we set low bars for the behavior we'll accept from boyfriends or husbands. Hey, it's better than being alone, right?
Wrong.
If you're putting up with substandard behavior from men, make decision to stop. Refuse to date anybody until you attract a man who makes your happiness a priority. Trust me; such a man will come into your life and stay there.
Treat him as you have come to expect him to treat you, which means with affection, respect, and consideration. Does this sound boring to you? If it does, please examine your feelings about relationships and see if they haven't determined the kind of men you attract.
You see, once you stop dating men who disappoint you but excite you, you can make room for a guy who loves you the way you deserve to be loved--and who excites you. Love and excitement are important, but if they're accompanied by pain, something's wrong. You'll never be truly happy with a guy who lets you down.
Ask yourself, "Where did I ever get the idea that love has to hurt?"
Give yourself time to come up with the answers. Take stock of whether your relationship is worth saving. If you speak up, will it make a difference? If not, are you willing to make room for a man who will love you and make you laugh instead of cry for a change?
"Because when pain has been intertwined with love and closeness, it's very difficult to believe that love and closeness can be experienced without pain." -Gloria Steinem, "Revolution from Within."
If you tend to attract men who disappoint you (by cheating on you, not showing up when they say they will, or just refusing to get off the couch), you may be confusing love with pain.
So many of us have been brought up to believe that pain is normal, even expected, in a love relationship. Without it, the relationship seems flat, boring. We crave drama. (Why is it that so many women have great sex after a fight with a significant other?)
A happy, loving relationship eludes us because we don't recognize it when we see it, or because we simply believe it's not possible (News Flash: According to a recent Today Show, all men lie. All of them! I wasn't aware that men have a monopoly on lying or other bad behavior. I know some women who are breathtaking liars. Don't you?).
According to the media, men are incapable of remembering birthdays, being monogamous, getting through a weekend unless they're transfixed before a marathon of football games. Women internalize these messages: That's the way men are. That's the way life is. Get over it.
And while the media is happy to sell us the myth of the unattainable happy relationship, some of us have come to believe in it because of our own experiences.
Some of us:
(a) Had parents who treated each other indifferently, (b) had parents who outright hated each other, (c) had fathers who ignored us as children, (d) had a parent who suffered from alcoholism, (e) had mothers who would rather have been doing something else, or (f) had a parent who suffered from a mental illness.
And so, we learned to associate love with pain. It's all we knew.
Others among us grew up in perfectly happy homes with parents who loved each other and delighted in us, but we still managed to:
(a) Internalize negative messages we heard from our friends' parents who were unhappily married, or
(b) Internalize negative messages we saw elsewhere (I know a woman who, during her impressionable teenage years, babysat for a couple who gave each other the silent treatment and expected her to relay messages. She also babysat for another family, where the father once came home early and started reading a porn magazine!).
As a result of this programming, we set low bars for the behavior we'll accept from boyfriends or husbands. Hey, it's better than being alone, right?
Wrong.
If you're putting up with substandard behavior from men, make decision to stop. Refuse to date anybody until you attract a man who makes your happiness a priority. Trust me; such a man will come into your life and stay there.
Treat him as you have come to expect him to treat you, which means with affection, respect, and consideration. Does this sound boring to you? If it does, please examine your feelings about relationships and see if they haven't determined the kind of men you attract.
You see, once you stop dating men who disappoint you but excite you, you can make room for a guy who loves you the way you deserve to be loved--and who excites you. Love and excitement are important, but if they're accompanied by pain, something's wrong. You'll never be truly happy with a guy who lets you down.
Ask yourself, "Where did I ever get the idea that love has to hurt?"
Give yourself time to come up with the answers. Take stock of whether your relationship is worth saving. If you speak up, will it make a difference? If not, are you willing to make room for a man who will love you and make you laugh instead of cry for a change?
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